Oh, Look–Another potential ex-boyfriend I missed the pleasure of dating. Bummer.
From Today’s POF message archive:
So you choose to judge people on the basis of their grammar?
[Interesting opening. That sounds like a challenge. WHY, sir, WHY would you open a conversation on a dating website with a CHALLENGE to the girl you are exerting effort to communicate with? Are you here to find a relationship, or to prove your superiority? Seriously, you can’t argue someone into different ideologies.]
Of course. [Which you would know had you read more than a few lines of my profile.] Do you not have standards by which you judge whether or not you would be interested in dating other human beings? [Obviously, he does, because he did not ask me on a date. Which means he “judged” me to be unsuitable.] Do I judge the value of a person’s humanity based on their grammar? No. But I am not naive enough to think that I would enjoy pursuing a relationship with someone who devalues that which I value deeply. Been there. Done that. It was a disaster.
Well it’s instinctive for the human mind to be judgemental, that’s a given, but in all actuality being a firm believer of God, he’s the only one allowed to do that. Or am I wrong? [Seriously? You’re playing the God-card here? What is your purpose in this? Yes, sir. Of COURSE you are wrong. Every day consists of a series of choices. Choices based on your JUDGMENTS. Do you seriously think you exist in a non-judgmental void? Newsflash, the very act of CHALLENGING my profile in the first place is an act of judgment on your part in which you judged me to be wrong. Therefore, you have proven yourself incorrect. I didn’t even have to say anything. But I couldn’t resist. So I did.]
If you believe that God calls you to abandon evaluation and judgment based on evaluations, I would encourage you to read the Bible. Proverbs might be a good place to start. [Lots of distinction between wise/unwise, people one should associate with, people one should avoid. Great advice for sound judgment.]
Like I said, I am not judging anyone’s human worth by their grammar (nor condemning them to Hell). I am, however, evaluating their suitability for potential committed relationship.
Well better to say evaluate then judge, just my opinion!
[Thank you for your opinion. Which, by the way, was a judgment. So basically, what you are saying is that it’s only ok for YOU to make judgments. Mine are wrong, but it’s perfectly ok for you to be judgmental.]
1 : to form an opinion about through careful weighing of evidence and testing of premises
(According to Mirriam Webster)
[“You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous of which is ‘never get involved in a land war in Asia,’ but only slightly less well-known is this: ‘Never go in against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line!’ ” And only slightly lesser-well-known is this: “Never challenge an English Major about her choice of words!”]
Okay thanks, sorry I bothered you
I have a bachelor’s degree in English. My passion for words compels me to choose them carefully.
You aren’t bothering me. I’m simply defending my choice of words.
[Seriously, I wasn’t bothered. More like terribly, terribly amused. Good luck finding a girl who will bow to your superior ideals.]