After almost a month on PoF, I’ve had quite a few close encounters of the stranger-than-fiction kind.
After reading through the Pulitzer-Prize-winning profile I posted, it’s pretty clear that my screening process for actually being willing to meet people in person is rather elaborate.
In order for me to consent to meet, a person must:
-Convince me that he is a male.
-Convince me that he is not someone who might end up stuffing me in the trunk of his car. (These first two are more or less intangibles, judged through nuance and intuition. It would be a serious red flag if someone actually said, “Guess what? I’m REALLY a guy! AND I’m not super creepy!” or something like that.)
-Have no shirtless pictures on their profile.
-Share at least a few interests that would make reasonable conversation points.
-Respect grammar by using capital letters, demonstrating an understanding of the difference between your/you’re and to/too/two, and attempting punctuation with moderate accuracy.
-Come across in a way that suggests a pleasant (or at least fascinating) personality.
-Be at least tolerable to look at. I try not to put too much emphasis on looks, but I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t consider them at all.
That’s it, though. Basically, present yourself as a non-scary male human with enough personality to be able to sustain at least an hour’s worth of (intelligent) conversation.
Once these prerequisites have been met (and it’s rather disheartening how few users actually meet them), I’m all for meeting up with people as soon as they are willing, because, let’s face it, a written persona is merely that–a persona. (Keep in mind that this is coming from someone who claims that her occupation is a hunter of baby seals. I think the only time I’ve ever seen a seal in real life has been at a zoo–and I don’t think any of them were young enough to qualify as babies. [needless to say, it’s not a very lucrative career when one lives in the middle of Minnesota]).
So I’ve had five dates so far.
And they have done nothing if not reinforce the concept that people might look great on paper, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it carries over into face-to-face interaction
Most (though not all) of these dates have been mild disasters in some form or another. In no particular order (lest any of them happen to be reading this), here’s a rundown of my Plenty of Fish dates thus far:
Continue reading “First Date Fiascoes (Why I Might Just Call it a Day and Buy a Cat)”